For the past 58+ years, I have been blessed with a godly
father. As I think about him (who he is to me; what he has done for me; and how
he has been used by God to shape who I am today), there are three key ways my
dad has interacted with me that stand out as most important. I have tried to
incorporate each of these in my relationship with my kids, and I would
challenge any reader to do the same.
A Friend
Over the years, my dad and I have developed a mutual friendship.
We both like being with each other and we have the greatest time doing things
together. We have shared life together. Dad, obviously, initiated this process
when I was little. He spent time with me when he could have done things with
others. And he did it because he wanted to.
As I grew older and began to participate in sports,
academics, and the arts, he was at every event. I honestly cannot remember a
time when he and mom weren’t there supporting me. I know he had to have missed
one every now and then, but it happened so infrequently it didn’t matter. The
thing I remember the most, however, is that we spent time reliving each event
and talking through what happened. It was as if we had both been active
participants. And I Loved It.
After college, I had the unique privilege of being in
business with dad. I got to see the way he thought, processed, attacked
challenges, and he invited me into his inner circle. We were partners. We
fought side by side. We laughed together, cried together, we got frustrated
together, and we celebrated --- together. But it wasn’t all work either. We
went fishing and hunting in the mountains of Montana, often with my
grandfather, dad’s dad.
Today, we are hundreds of miles apart. I try to connect by
phone each week and our past times together are often the topic of
conversation. He still wants to know what I am doing, how things are going, and
if there is anything he can do to help. My dad is one of my closest, and
dearest, friends. For me, a godly father means intentionally creating a mutual
friendship with your kids.
A Coach
It all started with sports. I learned how to throw a football, tackle, and block on Sunday’s in the back yard. He would map out a play and then work on the techniques of how to plant your feet, make a turn, and more. He taught me how to shoot a basketball, pitch a baseball, and hit one out of the park. One year in Benton City, Washington, he was my baseball coach. We went undefeated that year.
In High School, dad & I had hand signals we used to “talk” about pitch
selection. I would stand on the pitching mound with both feet on the rubber;
head bowed, and think of the next pitch I wanted to throw. Then I would look up
at dad to see the pitch he would call: If his fist pointed straight up,
fastball; If his fist was sideways, curve; And if his fist was pointed straight
at me, knuckleball. Most of the time our calls were the same. When they were
different, sometimes I used his call, other times I kept mine. Either way, we
had great conversations afterwards about what we chose, why we chose that pitch,
and of course the outcome.
My dad was one of the early pioneers in software
development. When he started coding for computers the hardware was the size of
a living room and he used punch cards in a long tray to write his programs. We
had to wear a parka while in the room because they kept it so cold. Evidently
the large number of tubes used to make these computers gave off so much heat
they had to cool the room to 50 degrees or so. I learned to write software from
Dad when I joined the small computer bookkeeping serve that he and mom started
in 1980. For more than 20 years, we developed school administrative
applications for accounting, student records, food service, and more all on
personal computers.
Dad has also been a coach personally as well. We have had
many conversations about parenting, marriage, work, and more. For me, a godly
father makes himself available to help his kids be the best they can be as a
coach.
A Brother-In-Christ
Nothing has been more important to me than this
relationship. My dad has modeled in front of me every day of my life what it
means to be a follower of Jesus Christ. He has lived transparently. I have seen
his victories, his defeats, his struggles, and his resolve to live a life that honors
God. There can be on greater thing a dad can do for his children than living
transparently to his kids.
Dad never dropped us off at church; he let us out at the
door, parked the car, and then lead the way inside. We prayed together, read
the Word together, sang together, and he and mom made our home an extension of
the church. I never really knew where church and home started and ended. They
were never separated. They were always one. And I will always be grateful for
that example. For me, being a godly father means integrating faith into every
part of life.
On August 12th, 1935
80 years ago, LeRoi Lewis Smith was born to Henry and Doris
Smith in Daily, Michigan. For 58 years he has been, and continues to be, my
friend, my coach, my brother-in-Christ – MY DAD.
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